Friday, March 09, 2012

Parenting with Astrology: Expressing Feelings

Amy Herring has been a professional astrologer for 15 years and a proud mother for 6 of those years. She has joyfully accepted Mlle. Kiddie’s gracious offer to share her thoughts once a month here at Kiddie Star Signs. To find out more about Amy and her personal readings for parents and children, visit her website at http://heavenlytruth.com.

Money and fame don’t solve every problem. Celebrity moms have their hopes and worries for their children too. However, Mlle. Kiddie would like to offer ‘everyday’ moms a chance to see astrology put into action to answer their parenting questions. After all, famous or not, you’re the world to your kids! If you’ve got a question about your child that you’d like Amy to answer, send your questions any time to amy@heavenlytruth.com.

Ayanna writes:
My 9-year-old daughter, Gaia, rarely says how she feels, even when asked. She expresses her feelings by curling up and being quiet or by "showing the face of being in agreement" but some behaviors play out revealing otherwise. I have noticed when she is ready she will talk but she will only share experiences not her feelings. She does not like to be pushed with her feelings.
My hope is that at some point she will feel comfortable talking about some of the issues that go on in her life and our family life in regards to her well-being. How can I best support her in this?
Gaia, 9 years ~ Click to enlarge

Amy answers:
Starting from some of the deepest levels and working our way up, I see that Gaia has a south node in Sagittarius, right next to Pluto, in the 10th house. In children (and even adults), Pluto can represent a deep fear, and the behaviors we create as defense mechanisms in order to shield ourselves from that fear. Sagittarius is a sign of many things, one of which is the formation of one's beliefs and the expression of those beliefs. The 10th house is where we find some of the most visible behaviors about a person. It, along with the 11th house, can be considered a house of the public.

Ordinarily the south node in outgoing Sagittarius in a public 10th house might indicate someone who's not afraid to express themselves. However, with Pluto there, I get the sense that she may have a deep fear of being "burned at the stake," figuratively speaking, for sharing her beliefs or expressing herself. There may be a fear of being seen on this level, because of the repercussions. She may not even be aware that she feels this or the depth behind it; it's frequent that even adults cannot exactly pinpoint the nature of certain Pluto fears, but the behaviors that stem from those fears are usually easier to spot, even if not easier to understand or change.

On the more practical, every day living level, her Moon, the planet of emotion and vulnerability, is in Scorpio, which is a rather private sign. Her feelings are likely quite deep and can even be overwhelming, but Scorpio doesn't like to reveal much about itself. Mercury, the planet of communication, is in her 8th house, which is also a placement emphasizing privacy. Her Mars and Sun in Virgo may sometimes have her feeling too anxious to allow the chaos of her emotions to be revealed, even to herself, as Virgo wants to control circumstances around them and remain in control of themselves so they are not overwhelmed. Even her Aquarius Rising can work against revealing herself, presenting a more detached face to the world than what's going on in the privacy of her heart.

Finally, Venus, the planet of relating, connecting, sharing oneself and receiving another, is also in private Scorpio, but it is in tension with her Aquarius Ascendant. Your observation about Gaia not liking to be pushed about her feelings is an important one. Aquarius pushes back when pushed. Trying to push in, even with good intentions, kicks up the automatic Aquarian defense: rebellion and contrariness. Letting her talk on her own terms while trying to be as free from agenda as a mother can possibly be (talk about tough) is the best bet to allow her the room to bridge the gap when she wants to. On those occasions she can trust herself and the moment enough to reveal, her Mercury in Libra will enjoy the perspective of another as a sounding board, and her Sun and Mars in the 7th house of partnership will appreciate the connection and validation.

Hope this provides some insight. Thanks for your question!


Would you like some input on how to understand and nurture your child in the most effective way for their unique needs? Amy offers readings for parents and children; find out more at her website. If you would like to submit a question for her monthly blog here, email her anytime!
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